My Biggest Accomplishment from the Past Few Months

After a year of putting it off because I didn't feel "qualified," I finally recorded a podcast with Power of Moms about Intuitive Eating!

Some of you may remember that I recorded a podcast with them about my experience of going to counseling and learning about the cycle of unhealthy stress and negative self-talk in my life.  This is the follow-up podcast to that first one, focused more specifically on eating disorders and learning to listen to and love my body.

It was scary to record this because I am so far from living all of these principles perfectly all the time--BUT I do believe in these ideas 100%, and I am so SO much happier than I was a few years ago when I was trapped in the diet-binge cycle and loathing myself for my inability to lose weight. So even though I felt inadequate and vulnerable recording this podcast, I am proud of myself for getting up the courage to just do it and put it out there for other women who might need it.

I think sometimes I feel like I can't be a spokesperson for Intuitive Eating because I'm not thin--but this isn't about being thin.  This is about being happy.  And sane.  And not hating yourself all the time.   And not allowing your life to be consumed with thoughts of dieting, desserts, calories, cellulite, food journals, clothes that no longer fit you, the judgement of others...the list goes on.  It's exhausting.  And emotionally damaging.  And there is another way to live!

After recording this podcast, I felt even more committed to living these principles.  I can explain them intellectually a lot better than I can actually live them--but I do believe that it is possible to become a truly intuitive eater, and I have several friends who definitely live and eat this way.  It's inspiring. 

I want to continue on this journey--continue learning how to respect, listen to, and love my body.  Who will join me??

If you ever feel like you are war with your body (constantly worrying about your weight, pledging to start your diet "tomorrow," eating in secret, or feeling self-loathing daily), this podcast is for you.  And even if you are in a good place with your body image, it might be worth listening to learn some ideas for maintaining sanity in the midst of a culture that is obsessed with weight.

Here is the link:
https://powerofmoms.com/listening-to-and-loving-your-body-through-intuitive-eating/ 

Let me know what you think!

My Articles on Power of Moms

I thought I would share links to the articles that I wrote for Power of Moms in the past year.  I had a goal to write something once a month, but hey, every three months is better than nothing!

I plan to continue writing for them this year, and I will occasionally share the links.  Thanks for reading!

 How to Journal as a Busy Mom

I have been an avid record-keeper since I started my first “Jernel” at age 7. That yellow binder is filled with crayon scrawlings of some of my deepest thoughts and questions, such as “Today we are going to a picneak. What will I eat there?”

This journaling habit continued into my teens and young adulthood, and, fortunately, my entries became more meaningful over the years. Since becoming a mother, however, it is much harder to find blocks of uninterrupted time to sit, reflect, and write.

If, like me, you want to keep a journal and record of your children's lives, but you struggle to find the time as a busy mother, here are five tips...  {Read full article here.}

 Anchored by Beautiful Moments

A trusted friend once told me, “In motherhood, the hard moments sometimes outnumber the beautiful moments, but the beautiful moments always outweigh the hard moments.” I have developed a few strategies to give the perfect moments in motherhood even more weight so they can anchor me through the hard times. {Read full article here.}

How My Son's Routine-Chart Helped Me Be a Better Mom

This morning, I found myself lying face-down on the wet sidewalk leading up to my front door.

No, I hadn’t slipped on the dewy grass while going to get the mail or been attacked by a neighborhood mugger; I was down on the concrete on purpose, peering into the garden with my four-year-old son, Noah...

This is why I love my son’s morning routine chart. I love it because it holds me accountable for the things that are important to me as a mother—the things that would probably get lost in the midst of the urgent “to-dos” and daily craziness of motherhood, if they weren’t included in our simple daily chart.  {Read full article here.}

Three Strategies for Being a Less Annoying Parent

I recently had to face a harsh but true reality: I am an annoying parent.  My ten-month-old daughter is too young to be bugged by me (yet), but my three-year-old son, Noah, could certainly testify that I can be annoying to be around.

Kids are just little grown-ups. Like us, they have opinions and personalities. Like us, they get bugged and resistant when people interrupt them, nag them, coerce them, or boss them around. 

Obviously this doesn’t mean that we never potty train our children, never enforce bedtime, and never expect them to help us clean the house; but I have learned that I can be a much more pleasant parent if I simply tweak the delivery of my expectations. Here are three strategies I use... {Read full article here.}

Ridiculous Birthday Month

My month of May was completely excessive.  I didn't mean for it to be--that's just the way it turned out.  My friends kept inviting me on once-in-a-lifetime girls' trips, and how could I say no??

It started with a trip to Orlando with some of my best girlfriends from our years in Buffalo.  Tiffany schemed up the idea to go to Harry Potter World, and there was no way I could pass that one up.  If you read my last post about my mom, you know that I am a die-hard Harry Potter fan.  I had a Harry Potter party for my 19th birthday, shortly before my mom passed away, and my whole family dressed up in character.

I know it sounds crazy, but Harry Potter was my "escape" during those very difficult months when my mom was so sick.  I think I read the second, third, and fourth books that year, and it was just a mindless, magical escape.  The following year, I was reading the newly released fifth book while walking across my college campus, and I walked into an open manhole because I was so engrossed. Yes, this happened.  Fortunately, the manhole wasn't very deep, and my backpack caught on the edge of it and held me up, so after a helpful person walking by assisted me in untangling myself, I walked away with scraped shins and no permanent damage.  (Only Rachel Nielson, right?  That needs to be its own hashtag.)

Anyway, I found a great deal on airline tickets to Orlando, and we made a weekend of it. We were just a little bit excited. ;)

Harry Potter World did not disappoint.  It was so elaborate--every detail perfectly rendered.  I felt like I was actually stepping into Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade, and yes, Tiffany and I even busted out our cool kids Gryffindor robes and drank too much butterbeer while we were there.  I love my friends.

On Sunday, Natalie and I went to church, walked around the Orlando temple grounds, and then went and sat on the beach.  Yep, I'd say that's a perfect Sunday right there.

The next weekend was the annual Power of Moms Board Meeting and Retreat in Park City, Utah.  As always, I learned so much and came back with tons of ideas for being a more deliberate, present mother.  I love this organization, and I'm honored to work with them.  I recently wrote an article for them about isolating the perfect moments in motherhood in the midst of the crazy/hard moments.  Here it is if you are interested:  Anchored by Beautiful Moments.

Power of Moms Board Members

A couple weekends later, my girlfriends from our residency years in Denver invited me to go hiking with them in the mountains of Colorado, since their husbands are finishing school and they are all moving to different places around the country.  Again, couldn't pass up that opportunity, so I drove on over and enjoyed a couple of days of leisure in the mountains--so beautiful.  And so fun to be with kindred spirits with whom I can talk for hours!

Before I headed back to Idaho, I spent one evening at my Dad's house and got to see him and my grandparents and my older sister.  Sarah and I went to breakfast and shopping the next day, and I loved it.  Nothing fills me up more than spending time with my sisters.

And oh no, the fun is not over yet.  My little sister Laura decided to come visit me for Memorial Day Weekend!  Ryan was at a Conference in Seattle, so it was awesome to have Laura's company and help with the kids--as well as someone to snuggle with in my bed.  I love me a good SSO (Sister SleepOver).  We hiked a little, shopped a little, ate a lot, and laughed a lot.  We also took the kids to the hot springs one day, and Laura and Sal were twinning in their polka dots.

Ridiculously, my actual birthday hadn't arrived quite yet, so the day before, Ryan took me and Noah to pick out new bikes.  (Noah learned how to ride a two-wheeler a few months ago, so we wanted to be able to take family bike rides this summer.)  We then met up with his family in the Snake River Canyon and went canoeing and later had a BBQ at our house.  Funnest!

On the day of my birthday, we didn't do much.  Ryan felt bad about it and apologized for not making my birthday more special.  Ummm, are you kidding me??  I am the most spoiled rotten girl in this world.  Granted, most of the fun in May was not technically for my birthday month, but I wasn't about to stomp my foot and demand more!!  It was a perfect month from start to finish.  I am so grateful that I have such wonderful friends who invite me to do fun things with them, and I am so grateful that I have such a wonderful husband who encourages me to go and adventure and connect with other women and who is 100% capable of taking care of the kids while I am away.  I love him, and I love how sweet he is with our kids.

Ryan snapped a few photos of me and the kiddos as we rushed off to church on my 31st birthday.  When I look at these pictures, I can see the happiness in my face, and I don't think it's just because I'd had an exessively fun and relaxing month.  I have had an amazing 31 years, and my favorite part of it all is the incredible people in it--my friends, my dad, my grandparents, my sisters, my in-laws, my husband, my kids--I can't believe that I got to spend time with all of them during the month of May.  Happy birthday to me!!

My Podcast, My Journey

A few months ago, I mentioned that I was preparing to record a podcast for Power of Moms about what I had learned in counseling for an eating disorder.  I went through all of my notes from a year's worth of therapy and pulled out some of my major "take-aways" to share in a 45-minute presentation that I hoped could be helpful to anyone who is wanting to feel less stress and more joy.

It was so rewarding to do this.  It was a great refresher of what I'd learned in counseling, and there was so much that I myself needed to review and recommit to.

It was also a great reminder of how far I've come and how different my life is now than it was only three years ago.  Sometimes I feel like I have gotten no where in my relationship with food, myself, and my body, but looking back at my journaling from those years, it was very easy to see that I have indeed come a LONG way and changed so much for the better.  (Insert party hat and cheering hands emojis.  Does anyone else think in emojis now?)

I was so nervous to record the podcast, and after it was done, I second guessed everything that I had said and felt a little sick inside (hello, sharing some of the most intimate and private revelations and experiences of your life)--but I was so pleasantly surprised with how it turned out when it aired on the Power of Moms website and I listened to it for the first time.  Of course it is not perfect, and there are moments that I wish I could re-record and say differently, but overall, I feel like it is a good recap of a lot of really important insights and strategies that I have learned through my eating disorder journey.  I feel like it could be helpful to people, whether or not they have struggled with body image demons, and that feels so good.  It feels amazing to share the tools that have made an immense difference in my life.

So if you are interested in learning how to stop the cycle of negative self-talk in your life and change your habits without resorting to guilt or self-loathing as a motivator, listen to my podcast! You can listen from a computer or from your phone--it's super easy, just a click and then listen away while you fold laundry, do dishes, or drive to work.

Here's a link to the podcast, with lots of resource links at the bottom: Unhealthy Stress or Habits? Break the Cycle!

And here's a link to the narrative therapy that I mention in the podcast (and that I initially published here, with much trepidation.  Can you believe that I got the courage to share it on a national website??  Proof right there that counseling can change you, LOL!): The Surprising Way I Confronted My Eating Disorder

Thank you all for sharing my journey with me.  It's not even close to over, but I am making progress.   I am thinking about doing a series about "intuitive eating" on this blog this year--focusing on one of the ten principles of intuitive eating each week, sharing my experiences with that principle and offering a "challenge" to live that principle in daily life that week.  ("Intuitive eating" is the philosophy that my counselor taught me for developing a healthy relationship with food.  It's based on a book, but it is so much more than that.)

What do you think?  Would this interest anyone out there?  I need to review all of these principles myself because it is one thing to know them intellectually and a different thing entirely to actually live them.  I need to work on the living them part, and I would love to have some company and support as I continue on this adventure.  Let me know if you're in!

Now go listen to the podcast if you want less stress in your life!  And who doesn't want that?

xoxo

Living Without My Eating Disorder, Narrative Therapy Part 3

And now it's time for the happy ending. Well, the happy ending that I imagine for myself.

As the final assignment for my "narrative therapy," my counselor asked me to picture a future without my eating disorder in it.  Who did I hope to be?  How would freedom feel?  What would my life of freedom look like?

This is what I came up with.

It is amazing to me that my life today is much closer to this reality than it is to the reality that I described in my last post.  Sometimes my eating disorder thoughts and behaviors still come creeping back to me, and I start to worry that I have made no progress at all--but when I look back at the slow but cumulative growth that I've made during the last few years, it is easy to recognize how far I've come. Sometimes it's still a battle, but I am winning.  I don't plan to lose.

Have you seen the movie "A Beautiful Mind" about John Nash, a mathematician and Nobel Prize winner who suffered from schizophrenia?  The movie chronicles his discovery that some of the key people in his life, including his best friend and his boss, are not real but are figments created by his mental illness.  Near the end of the movie, John has reached a stable place with his illness for many years and requests a teaching job at Princeton University. Referring to John's schizophrenic illusions, his colleague asks him,  "What about the...well, you know...are they gone?"  As viewers, we can see what John sees in his mind, and as he looks over his shoulder, his imaginary friends are there, walking just steps behind him.  He responds to his colleague, "No, they're not gone.  Maybe they never will be.  But I've gotten used to ignoring them, and as a result, I think they've kind of given up on me."  He continues, "I think that's what it's like with all of our dreams and our nightmares...we've got to keep feeding them for them to stay alive."

Now I am not claiming to know anything about schizophrenia, and I don't think that mental illness will just go away if you ignore it.  But I love the message of that scene and have thought about it often and in various contexts in the 12 years since that movie was released: I choose which thoughts to entertain, which dreams and which nightmares.  Some weaknesses and natural personality traits may never completely go away for me--but I can decide not to dwell on them and not to give them power.

I choose not to live with my eating disorder anymore.  I choose to ignore her.  I choose to love myself and my body, no matter what size it is.  I choose to live today in a way that is leading me toward the beautiful future that I imagine for me and my family--to feed my dreams instead of my nightmares.  Even if my future doesn't end up looking exactly as this narrative describes, I am determined that it will include the key elements captured here: love for myself, love for my family, love for my body, love for God, love for others, and love for life.

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I am the mother of five beautiful children.  It is a busy, chaotic life, but, for the most part, I am able to keep my cool and mother with love because I love myself.  I am close to my Father in Heaven. I feel His love for me, and I know my worth.  

I am able to take the stresses of life in stride, instead of eating my way through them.  When I do revert to emotional eating, which happens on occasion, I forgive myself and move forward.  My eating disorder rarely comes knocking anymore—she knows there is no point.

I teach my children to take care of their bodies, minds, and souls.  We eat lots of delicious fruits and vegetables—and of course some awesome treats too.  Food isn’t the center of our family and universe, but we aren’t afraid of it.

We get outside and exercise together a lot as a family.  We go for hikes and bike rides.  We go for after-dinner walks around the neighborhood.  A few nights a week, Ryan and I put the kids to bed and have a teenaged neighbor come over and sit with them, so we can go walking or jogging under the stars together, just like we did when we were dating.  We are active and strong.

I take the breaks that I need from mothering my big family, and I don’t feel guilty about it.  I have a sitter twice a week for a few hours, so I can go to a local coffee shop and write.  I also take an evening every week to myself, meeting up with a friend for dessert, going to a bookstore to read, or just taking a walk by myself at sunset to think and pray. Because I want to be present and relaxed for my family and friends, I say “no” to extra curricular activities and responsibilities that will leave me feeling overwhelmed and drained. 

I am someone whom people can call on a whim.  I am available to talk and to help—I am not stressed and overly busy all the time.

I find joy in serving other people, and it’s a big part of my life and the lives of my children.  It is one of the things that nourishes me and fills me.  I tutor underprivileged kids in reading and writing, and I know I am making a difference to them.  I teach my own kids to look for opportunities to serve others, and I help them follow through on their ideas for service.  It gives me so much joy to see the light that comes from service in my children’s eyes.

I am happy.  I am fulfilled.  I am able to see the value and meaning in my life.  I no longer feel stress or self-loathing on a daily basis.  I get enough sleep.  I take care of myself.  I feel my emotions instead of fleeing from them through starvation, exercise, or excess. 

I love and savor life, with all of its ups and downs.

I love and nourish myself, with all of my weaknesses and imperfections.

I am grateful.  I am at peace.

I am free.

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To listen to my Power of Moms podcast about what I learned in counseling, click here:
            Unhealthy Stress or Habits? Break the Cycle!

And to see this narrative therapy published on the Power of Moms website, click here:
           The Surprising Way I Confronted My Eating Disorder

Meeting My Eating Disorder: Narrative Therapy, Part 1

I have been thinking about eating disorders again.  I am recording a podcast for Power of Moms this Friday about what I learned when I went to counseling for an eating disorder, so I've spent a lot of time this week preparing and attempting to organize my thoughts on this complex and personal topic.  Going back through my notes and the books that I read during my counseling has been awesome and gratifying.  It has reminded me of how much I learned and how far I've come in my relationship with food.  I am a dramatically different and happier person now than I was when I was trapped in destructive cycles of dieting, negative self-talk, and obsessing about food/exercise/body image.  Man, am I glad to be free of all of that.

As overwhelming as it is to condense a year's worth of counseling and self-reflection into a 40-minute podcast, I am so grateful for the opportunity.  I can't wait to record it, and I can't wait to share it once it airs.

As part of my preparation for this podcast, I've revisited something that I wrote during the "narrative therapy" component of my counseling.  For this exercise, my counselor asked me to embody my eating disorder as a character in a story--a person separate from myself whom I could interact with and analyze.  She told me to write about how my eating disorder and I met, what our relationship was like, and what my future looked like with or without him/her in it.  I did this in three different portions, over the course of three weeks, and we discussed the insights I gained from each chapter as I wrote it.

This was a super interesting and eye-opening exercise, and the finished product is pretty heart-wrenching to read.  I've decided that I'm finally ready to share it on this blog.  I've been contemplating doing so for over a year but have never had the courage.  I share it now in hopes that it will help someone who might be feeling alone, trapped, and desperate.

There is hope.  You can change.  I know this because I have been there and I am not there anymore.  As I wrote in a blog post back in May, I can only share this now because it is so very far from my reality today.  That can be true for you too--I promise.

I will publish this in three parts over the next three days.  Today's portion is Part 1: How I Met My Eating Disorder.  

And here we go...

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She came to me one night when I was out for a run under the starry skies of Provo, Utah.

She pulled up beside me in running shorts, falling right into stride with me--as if she knew me, as if she’d been waiting for me.

“You could run faster than this, you know,” she said, matter-of-factly.

“Huh?” I asked, vaguely confused about who she was, but so taken by her nonchalance that I almost felt like we’d planned the meeting.

She repeated herself.  “You could run faster than this.”  I didn’t respond, but I didn’t have to.  She hadn’t meant it as a question.  “And I hear your mother is dying,” she continued.

Again, it was a statement of fact.  And as we plodded along in side-by-side silence, breathing heavily, taking in the night air, I didn’t say anything more. 

“It’s okay.  I’ll be here for you,” she said simply.  “I can make it better.”

These runs, which had started just a few months earlier when I’d left home for my freshman year of college, had never been about running fast, or burning calories, or counting mileage—they had been a time of solitude and peace, a time to think and to try to make sense of my vastly changing life.

I wasn’t sure I wanted company.  

But I didn’t tell her to leave. And as we reached my dorm hall and I watched her padding off into the night, her long blonde hair swinging with her steady stride, I knew that I would be seeing her again. 

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Part 2, "Living with My Eating Disorder," tomorrow...

I Realized...

I've been reading my copy of Motherhood Realized this week, and I realized something (no play on words intended there): our needs as mothers change constantly.

Shocking, right?  Well what prompted this grand revelation is that, though I read all of these essays before when I was helping to edit the initial manuscript, totally different essays stand out to me now.

I first found Power of Moms when I was a discouraged new mother with a colicky baby.  I was adjusting to a very new life as a homemaker, and during those long winter days when the weather was too awful to get out much, I sometimes turned to Pinterest to fill the time.  I would get totally overwhelmed by all of the beautiful and delicious-looking recipes, the money-saving tips, and the advice about chore rotations to keep your home spotless.  Is this what I was supposed to be able to accomplish as a stay-at-home mom?  So many other moms that I knew seemed to be able to get decent meals on the table and keep their homes deep-cleaned.  As my baby screamed in my arms and I looked around at my messy apartment, I felt like I was failing.

Then I read Your Children Want You, an essay written by the founder of Power of Moms, which assured me that "...it is our uniqueness  and love that our children long for...it is our voices.  Our smiles...Of course we want to learn, improve, exercise, cook better, make our homes lovelier, and provide beautiful experiences for our children; but at the end of the day, our children don't want a discouraged, stressed-out mom who is wishing she were someone else."

The whole essay, in which she shared tender, real moments with her own mother and her own children, spoke to my heart and reassured me.  Reading that essay lead me to search for other articles and resources on the Power of Moms website which were invaluable to me during my adjustment-period to motherhood.

Now as I read that same essay, though I still think it's so well-written and such an important and timely topic for mothers, it doesn't resonate as much personally.  I've matured as a mother; I don't compare myself as often as I used to or hold myself to such an impossible standard; I've learned that I can focus on my talents instead of wishing that I had others' that just don't come naturally to me.  (And I've stopped looking at Pinterest altogether because it just makes me feel overwhelmed.)

So while I enjoy reading that essay now, there are others that speak more to my current stage of mothering.

For example, the essay Love Loans describes one mother's experience of feeling totally exhausted by caring for the needs of her young family and catering to the requests of her toddlers.  This, I understand.  Noah has been unusually whiny, needy, and defiant lately, and though I know this is normal two-year-old behavior, sometimes I feel like I just can't do another moment of being patient.  Not one more moment.  The author of Love Loans reaches a similar point with her children--"there wasn't an ounce, sliver, or tiny shred of patience left in me."  But then, as she was putting her son to bed  and "mechanically" going through the motions, "sweet mercy of miracles...the love came unbidden, bubbling up and over, into the cracks of my consciousness."  She suddenly realizes, "...I have a Partner in this mothering that I do.  A Partner who helps me, lifts me up, and loans me love when I'm certain I've run out."

Love Loans is the only essay in the book that is religious, and I love it.  That last line gives me goosebumps because I have had moments like this--moments when I've received a "love loan" from my Father in Heaven because I literally have nothing left to give.  He fills me up and makes me more than I am on my own.  He allows me to feel the incredible, overpowering love that He has for Noah and for me, and somehow, I am able to make it through the umpteenth reading of The Cat in the Hat that month, or the 3,000th shriek of "But why????" I've heard that day, or the third messy underwear accident I've cleaned up that week (true story--this happened this morning), without completely losing it.

This is what the essays on Power of Moms, and in their book Motherhood Realized, have done for me--they've given me something to think about and relate to during the different moments and stages of my mothering.

I will admit that as I've promoted this book this week, I've started to feel a bit self-conscious.  What if other people don't like it as much as I do?  My sister, after ordering one for herself and several for her friends, asked, "Do you promise this is actually a good book?"  Hahaha...no pressure or anything!

I've thought about her question, and the answer that I've come to is, yes, it's actually a good book.  It's written by varied mothers with varied experiences.  Will every single essay in the book resonate with you, your personality, and your current mothering experience?  I doubt it.  But I sincerely believe that some will.  And I believe that others may start to apply more as your stage of life changes.  At least that's the experience I've had.

So that's my disclaimer about the book and my review of it.  If you think this book is something you would enjoy reading, you should order a copy of it today (Saturday).  Today is the last day of pre-sales which will determine if the book makes the NY Times Bestsellers' List.  Apparently we are close which is exciting. 

Okay, off to play with my little cherub now.  As hard as he can be at times, he really is my favorite.

Motherhood Realized

I write and edit for an organization called Power of Moms, and they are releasing a book this month called Motherhood Realized.  It's a compilation of some of their most read and most shared posts from their website.

I know I may be biased, but I think the book is pretty awesome.  I helped with some of the initial editing of the manuscript, and I was amazed by the quality of the essays, which are all written by everyday moms about their everyday experiences.  Though these are not professional writers or childhood psychologists, the insights that they share are profound, touching, and encouraging.  I think the title "Motherhood Realized" is fitting because this book represents the realizations that dozens of mothers have had over years of calming tantrums, witnessing milestones, struggling through family heartbreaks, celebrating family joys, and living each day as mothers. These topics have been addressed in countless books and articles over the years, but what struck me as I read over the manuscript of this book is that the insights shared seemed really "fresh" and unique to me--not just the same old motherhood cliches.

This is a book a busy mom could easily read because each essay only takes a couple of minutes to peruse.  You could keep it on your nightstand and read an essay each night or each week to help inspire you after a long, chaotic day.  After each essay, there is a "question" and a "challenge" to get you thinking about your own mothering experience.

This is not a "how to" book with ideas about getting your baby on a schedule or feeding your kids organic foods or anything like that--it's about the realizations that come along the way as we mother, about finding more joy, about enduring the hard times with grace, about loving our children better and more deliberately.  There is nothing in this book that will give you "mom guilt."  Nothing.  It will leave you feeling uplifted, I promise.

Two of the essays I have written for the website are published in the book: one about my mother's battle with breast cancer, and one about my difficult first year of motherhood.  I will also be reading the essay about my mom at a "book launch" event that Power of Moms is hosting in Salt Lake City on the evening of Thursday, April 3rd.  If you live in that area, you should come!  The founders of POMs will be speaking, and many of the authors published in the book will be reading their work.  Details here.

I strongly recommend buying this book!  I don't think you will regret it--in fact, if you do, I will buy your copy back from you and give it to one of my friends/sisters as a gift.  (Yes, I just offered a money-back guarantee...I feel like a real saleswoman!)  Power of Moms is hoping that the book can make the New York Times' Best Sellers list, so more moms worldwide will hear about it and will be uplifted by the message that nothing in life is as important as family, and motherhood, though difficult, is beautiful and worthwhile.

So if you are interested in buying the book, don't delay--do it right now, or this week, because the pre-sale numbers are what determine whether it gets on the "best sellers" list.  I get a free copy of the book because I am published in it, but I am going to head over to Amazon today and order a few more to give as gifts. (I think it would be a great Mothers' Day or baby shower gift.) Amazon will restock the books by April 8th (the official release date) but don't hesitate to order now.

I know this might feel a little gimmicky, but I promise you, this is an amazing organization that has blessed my life, and this is an amazing book that I really think will bless your life as well.  (And remember, if it doesn't, there's always my awesome money-back guarantee.)

And just because this post isn't long enough and salewoman-ish enough already, here is a link to one of my favorite essays published in the book (it's really hard to choose, but this one stands out to me for some reason): http://powerofmoms.com/2012/12/the-power-of-pause/. Maybe I will post some more of these links this week to convince you that you really need to order this book.

Okay, done now!  Have a great week!

Our (Crazy Busy) Month of May

We had an exciting May (and I got way behind on blogging!).

*I attended a Power of Moms Retreat and Board meeting in Park City, Utah.  It was a great experience.  The board meeting was the night before the Retreat, and I loved having the opportunity to meet in-person all of the women with whom I work online.  I also loved sitting down together and brainstorming ways that we can improve the organization and the website.  Using feedback from the meeting, we've already revamped the submissions categories for mothers who are interested in writing for the site. (Don't forget, anyone can write for the site!  You should do it!)

Power of Moms Board
(minus those who couldn't attend the meeting)

The Retreat was so informative and inspirational.  I took lots of notes which I still haven't found the time to sort and compile--but my friend Sarah did a great write-up on her blog about what she learned from the conference.  You can check out her post here.

I also spent lots of hours at the end of April/beginning of May editing a book for Power of Moms which will come out next spring.  I am super excited about it because it is a compilation of some of their "best" essays from the last five years, and I think it's going to be an excellent read.  Finding Power of Moms was an answer to prayers for me, as it has given me a way to continue pursuing my interests in writing and editing while also learning more about motherhood in the process.  Now if only I could find more time to write for the site, instead of spending all of my time editing!!

*A few weeks later, we had a visit from Katie, Noah's birthmom.  She came to Denver to audition for the X Factor.  She is so beautiful and talented, and Noah had a blast with her while she was in town.  We missed Drew (in fact, when we pulled up to the airport, and Noah saw Katie standing with her bag alone, he asked, "Where's Drew?").  Fortunately, we were able to Facetime with both of them once Katie got back to Utah.  I love how much Noah's birthparents adore him.

*My dad had the main floor of his home remodeled.  This is the house that I grew up in, so it was a big deal for our entire family, and it turned out so beautiful.  The kitchen was the biggest project (with new cupboards, appliances, and granite countertops), but I think my favorite part is the new windows on the tall wall in the living room.  They let in so much light, and all of the green leaves of the trees outside make me feel like I am in a tree house whenever I walk down the stairs.

*We got family photos taken when my little sister and her hubby were in town because who knows when we will all be together in the same place again!

My grandparents joined us too, for a few multigenerational shots, and when the photographer was taking a picture of Gramps and Grammy together, Gramps said, "Make this good!  It's going to be our obituary pic!"  I love that old man!  And could these two be any cuter??

*Noah went to the dentist for the first time.  Dr. Daddy did his exam, and he came through it with no cavities!  (Thank goodness--because that would've been really embarrassing for Ryan!)  All of Ryan's colleagues were so excited to see Noah and showered him with so much attention that he got really bashful and nervous.  It was cute.

*Speaking of Dr. Daddy, Ryan went to Florida with his co-residents to present a research paper at the American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry Conference.  He has been working on the research for the past year and a half, and he is so glad to have that presentation behind him.  Despite the stress of his residency, he has loved working with his co-residents and always has so much fun with them, so the trip was a great vacation.  He and his buddies went to Hollywood Studios and stayed at a Disney Hotel.  Ryan dominated in mini-golf one night, getting five holes-in-one and winning a limited edition Disney golfball for having the low score of the day.  That's my Ry!

*We ended the month with my 29th birthday.  I love birthdays, and I insist on celebrating all week.  Ryan had the day off on Memorial Day, so he sent me shopping by myself (so much more fun than hauling a toddler along!), and I found several cute new outfits and even bought myself a delicious caramel apple from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory.  (Does it get any better?)  Two days later, my sister hired a babysitter for our kids so I could go with her to lunch and shopping at an antique store in Castlerock.  We were looking for furniture for Dad's new living room--we didn't have any luck, but we sure had a fun day together!  Two days after that, on my actual birthday, Ryan surprised me by leaving a beautiful potted orchid on the kitchen table and a humungous helium balloon in my car.  When Noah saw the balloon, he started shouting, "Oh my goodness!  Oh my goodness!"  Made my day.  One of my closest friends also took me to breakfast--I am a lucky, lucky girl.

We were supposed to go camping with some friends that night, but, sadly, I spent the evening of my birthday in the company of the toilet because a new medication I'd started taking that week made me super sick.  It was miserable.  I'm glad I started celebrating my birthday early so I didn't feel ripped off when I was throwing up on my big day.  The medication continued to have crazy side effects over the weekend, so my doctor told me to stop taking it, and I am relieved.  That was no way to start my 30th year of life!!

*Overall it was a very busy month, and life has not slowed down since.  Ryan and I are preparing like mad for our move to Idaho in a month.  We still have so much to do.  But life is good, and we are grateful.