Today is Easter, and I have been thinking about Christ all
month. I am somewhat amazed that the
Easter traditions and activities that I planned to do with the kids this week actually worked out (!!!), and it was a
spiritual, fun, peaceful week of learning for all of us. I love when I am able to teach Noah about the
things that matter most to me.
About a month ago, I admitted on this blog that I was feeling burned out as a mother. The constant cycle of cleaning, diapering, meal-making, picking up, disciplining, dressing—it had just started to wear on me. The day after day after day of the same mundane tasks, the constant effort to be patient, the helping get shoes on, the whining whining whining…I was suddenly just over it.
I think this is normal, and I think all parents go through weeks of feeling especially worn out and frustrated—and then somehow, and sometimes without apparent reason, the fog lifts and life seems manageable again.
But one of the things that was weighing on me the most during that week or two of feeling utterly depleted was that I didn’t see an end-in-sight. I thought, “Is this really what I have to look forward to for the next decade? Being a stay-at-home mom and cleaning up messes for whining children? I used to go to work and do something that I knew I was good at. I used to feel accomplished and successful at the end of the day. Now it’s impossible to measure how I am doing, and I just feel exhausted at the end of the day. Do I really have to do all of this again tomorrow?”
Fortunately, my perspective changed one afternoon as I was reading Noah a book before his quiet time. He had requested the Bible Stories book, and as I read to him about Peter walking on the water toward Jesus (Matthew 14:25-32), Noah asked me, “Why did he start to sink, Mama?”
Not thinking much of it, I said, “Because he stopped believing he could do it. He took his eyes off of Jesus. He looked around at the stormy waters and the wind, and he thought, ‘What am I doing??’ and he got discouraged and fearful, and he started to sink.”
All of the sudden, the words I was saying registered. And I knew that there was probably a reason we had opened the book to that particular Bible story that afternoon.<
I was like Peter. I had taken my eyes off the Savior. I had forgotten that these children of mine are a divine blessing from him, that my role as their mother is sacred. When I had looked around at the storm and all of the challenges of motherhood, I’d started to sink.
This story can be universally applicable, I think. We all have struggles and challenges of various types and degrees that leave us wondering, “Can I really do this? Can I defy this storm and stay afloat another day?”
Yes. Yes you can. If you keep your eyes on the Savior, you can accomplish miracles and do things you would never imagine—things you could never hope to do without His help. Doesn't mean it will always be easy, doesn't mean you will never feel discouraged; but it does mean that you will be able to make it through one more day if you simply keep your eyes on Him.
Snuggling Noah close, I read him the rest of that Bible story—how Peter called out to Jesus and He reached out His hand and pulled Peter back up to safety. Something in my heart told me that I could do the same. I could ask Christ to help me out of the pit of discouragement I was feeling. I could reach out to Him, and He would be there to save me.
I am grateful beyond words for Him. I am grateful that He loved me—me!—enough to suffer for my sins and my sorrows in the Garden of Gethsemane, to be tortured and then killed on the cross. I am infinitely grateful for His Resurrection, which means that I will get to be with Him again, with my mother again, with everyone whom I love on this earth again.
He bore my griefs and He knows how to comfort and lift me in the midst of my sorrows—even the small ones, such as a discouraging week as a mother. I have felt a difference this Easter season as I have turned to Him and kept my eyes on Him—and as I’ve tried to teach my family to do the same.
"Thanks be to God for His unspeakable, unspeakable, gift.
About a month ago, I admitted on this blog that I was feeling burned out as a mother. The constant cycle of cleaning, diapering, meal-making, picking up, disciplining, dressing—it had just started to wear on me. The day after day after day of the same mundane tasks, the constant effort to be patient, the helping get shoes on, the whining whining whining…I was suddenly just over it.
I think this is normal, and I think all parents go through weeks of feeling especially worn out and frustrated—and then somehow, and sometimes without apparent reason, the fog lifts and life seems manageable again.
But one of the things that was weighing on me the most during that week or two of feeling utterly depleted was that I didn’t see an end-in-sight. I thought, “Is this really what I have to look forward to for the next decade? Being a stay-at-home mom and cleaning up messes for whining children? I used to go to work and do something that I knew I was good at. I used to feel accomplished and successful at the end of the day. Now it’s impossible to measure how I am doing, and I just feel exhausted at the end of the day. Do I really have to do all of this again tomorrow?”
Fortunately, my perspective changed one afternoon as I was reading Noah a book before his quiet time. He had requested the Bible Stories book, and as I read to him about Peter walking on the water toward Jesus (Matthew 14:25-32), Noah asked me, “Why did he start to sink, Mama?”
Not thinking much of it, I said, “Because he stopped believing he could do it. He took his eyes off of Jesus. He looked around at the stormy waters and the wind, and he thought, ‘What am I doing??’ and he got discouraged and fearful, and he started to sink.”
All of the sudden, the words I was saying registered. And I knew that there was probably a reason we had opened the book to that particular Bible story that afternoon.<
I was like Peter. I had taken my eyes off the Savior. I had forgotten that these children of mine are a divine blessing from him, that my role as their mother is sacred. When I had looked around at the storm and all of the challenges of motherhood, I’d started to sink.
This story can be universally applicable, I think. We all have struggles and challenges of various types and degrees that leave us wondering, “Can I really do this? Can I defy this storm and stay afloat another day?”
Yes. Yes you can. If you keep your eyes on the Savior, you can accomplish miracles and do things you would never imagine—things you could never hope to do without His help. Doesn't mean it will always be easy, doesn't mean you will never feel discouraged; but it does mean that you will be able to make it through one more day if you simply keep your eyes on Him.
Snuggling Noah close, I read him the rest of that Bible story—how Peter called out to Jesus and He reached out His hand and pulled Peter back up to safety. Something in my heart told me that I could do the same. I could ask Christ to help me out of the pit of discouragement I was feeling. I could reach out to Him, and He would be there to save me.
I am grateful beyond words for Him. I am grateful that He loved me—me!—enough to suffer for my sins and my sorrows in the Garden of Gethsemane, to be tortured and then killed on the cross. I am infinitely grateful for His Resurrection, which means that I will get to be with Him again, with my mother again, with everyone whom I love on this earth again.
He bore my griefs and He knows how to comfort and lift me in the midst of my sorrows—even the small ones, such as a discouraging week as a mother. I have felt a difference this Easter season as I have turned to Him and kept my eyes on Him—and as I’ve tried to teach my family to do the same.
"Thanks be to God for His unspeakable, unspeakable, gift.
I really love this. So powerful. So true. :)
ReplyDeleteYes! It really is that simple and beautiful, and difficult and confusing - all at once. It can be so hard to always keep our eyes focused on Him and not get distracted or pulled down. But if we do, it is like night and day. I love this and you!
ReplyDeleteYes! It really is that simple and beautiful, and difficult and confusing - all at once. It can be so hard to always keep our eyes focused on Him and not get distracted or pulled down. But if we do, it is like night and day. I love this and you!
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful. Your writing resonates with me once again.
ReplyDelete