Happy Four Months!

Sweet Baby Noah,

You are four months old today!  You are getting so big.  Your eyes are wider, your hair is longer, and your scream is louder.  You are growing up.

I took you to the doctor today for your four-month check up, and she discovered that you are teething.  When she shined the flashlight into your mouth, we could see two tiny bottom front teeth about to break through the gums.  No wonder you've been so cranky this week--I was quite relieved to find out that there is a reason (and it's not that you hate your mother) AND that there is a solution (Baby Tylenol) for your grumpiness.  She also said to continue with the reflux medicine for a couple more months.

We spent last week in Idaho with family for Thanksgiving, and you were one happy little baby.  Everyone was there--Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt Ashley and Uncle Nate, Aunt Alli and Uncle Derek, Aunt Sara and Uncle Cole, and Uncle Tanner--and everyone held you and talked to you and danced with you.  I don't think you made a single whimper the entire week without someone scooping you up to soothe you.  You are seriously loved, child.

It's always difficult for adults to get back to reality after vacation, and I guess the same is true for babies.  I think it's been a bit of a shock for you to be back to reality.  Mom can't hold you 24/7.  She isn't strong enough, and she has to occasionally do things like clean the house and make dinner.  Sorry, Kiddo.

It is really hard for me when you cry and fuss, and you still do that much of the day.  It makes me feel helpless, isolated, and unsuccessful.  I will admit that the transition to being a stay-at-home mom has been difficult for me.  There is no where else I'd rather be, but it is hard nonetheless.  I think it is pretty common for women to feel this way, but I feel an added sense of guilt because I wanted you for so long and I want to be the perfect mother to you.  I was telling your dad tonight, "The only reward that mothers get is to see that their children are happy."  So when you're unhappy, I just feel rotten.

Cheer up soon, okay?

Christmas is coming, and snow was falling today.  It was so pretty, and I tried to show you out the apartment window.  You were staring so intently that I thought you were enjoying the wintery scene as much as I was...but then I noticed that you were merely staring at the string dangling from the blinds.  Go figure.

You started kind of playing with toys this month.  You love watching the mobile above your crib and batting at the toys hanging from your play gym.  You curl your legs up to your stomach and put your hands in your mouth as you watch the toys swaying above you.  It's too cute.

You've only rolled over once, that I've seen.  You don't like "tummy time" at all, so you rolled from your tummy to your back in order to escape.  I thought you'd be an early crawler because you are so strong, but if you refuse to be on your stomach, you might skip crawling all together and go straight to walking in several months. Walking...now that's a crazy thought.

The doctor said we should start you on solid foods now, so we'll try some rice cereal next week.  I hope you're not too excited...because that stuff is seriously bland.  But then again, anything tastes better than formula.  I recently tried a little sip, and I now understand why you spit up so often.  I would throw that stuff up too.  Sooooo nasty.

Speaking of spit up, you are a geyser.  Today while we were waiting in the examination room for the doctor, you spit up down my shirt (creating a sticky pool in a most uncomfortable place) and then you spit up in my lap (creating a large wet spot in a very unfortunate place).  Seriously, the doctor probably thought that Mommy needed a diaper.  Awkward!  But despite your constant spewing, you are gaining weight and growing just fine.  You weigh 14 lbs 14 oz (50th percentile), and you are 25.5 inches long (74th percentile).  Unlike your cousin Callum and your Aunt Sarah, you have a tiny head (26th percentile), which explains why none of your little baseball hats really fit you yet.  Oh well...we wouldn't want to cover up your cute hair anyway.

You did look super darling in this little beanie today though:

Love this little reindeer outfit for December 1st!
Love that little smile.

Happy Four Month Birthday, Noah.

We love you so much.

Mom